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Topic: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?

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847badgerfan

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #28 on: July 31, 2019, 02:46:17 PM »
Would anyone here invite a hairy naked man into your house? 

This hairy naked man doesn't wipe his ass, rarely bathes, freely sits on your couch, and he always wants to eat everything he possibly can.


Ponder, please.
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Anonymous Coward

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #29 on: July 31, 2019, 03:32:13 PM »
Probably depends on how safe and adorable he is.
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FearlessF

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #30 on: July 31, 2019, 04:14:02 PM »
yes, what's his personality like?
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betarhoalphadelta

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #31 on: July 31, 2019, 04:59:59 PM »
Quote from: FearlessF on July 31, 2019, 04:14:02 PM
yes, what's his personality like?
I see what you did there...

What about a pig?
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Cincydawg

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #32 on: July 31, 2019, 05:15:58 PM »
There is no way to tell if a person is going to be a decent parent from what I've seen.  My ex was a truly horrible parent.  The kids have told me stories about how they were treated on the weekends they were at her house.  Neglect would have been better.

When they got to be about 12 they would call me to pick them up so the could "do something", anything, they didn't care.  She handed them a pile of videos to watch and left the house.
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SFBadger96

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #33 on: July 31, 2019, 05:19:11 PM »
I'm with UTee in the belief that the kids will likely get over this faster than you. They are resilient, and their psychological development makes them better at focusing on the present than adults. That's not to say that it won't be painful and that they won't remember. It will be, and they will remember, but kids are resilient. Tell them--with whatever additional trappings you think are appropriate for the passing of a loved one. 

And it's ok that they will be sad. I still get sad thinking about the passing of the pets we lost over the years, particularly "my dog," but the joy they brought me far outweighs it.
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OrangeAfroMan

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #34 on: July 31, 2019, 11:19:29 PM »
Quote from: 847badgerfan on July 31, 2019, 02:46:17 PM
Would anyone here invite a hairy naked man into your house?

This hairy naked man doesn't wipe his ass, rarely bathes, freely sits on your couch, and he always wants to eat everything he possibly can.


Ponder, please.
How am I supposed to get any invitations if you're spreading this?!?!?   Shhhhhhh!
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“The Swamp is where Gators live.  We feel comfortable there, but we hope our opponents feel tentative. A swamp is hot and sticky and can be dangerous." - Steve Spurrier

OrangeAfroMan

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #35 on: July 31, 2019, 11:20:12 PM »
Quote from: NorthernOhioBuckeye on July 31, 2019, 07:04:02 AM
Please, don't insult people's beliefs that may differ from yours. There is no call for that.
So you're arguing that there IS a kitty heaven?  :57:

Tell us more....
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Brutus Buckeye

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #36 on: July 31, 2019, 11:33:32 PM »
Fro's kindergarten classes must be a hoot. 

"Kids, today we are going to learn that your parents lied to you about Santa, Kitty Heaven, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. You, your parents and your GD cat are actually just tiny little insignificant specks of dust on a floating space rock, destined to be worm food!" 
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OrangeAfroMan

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #37 on: August 01, 2019, 01:16:48 AM »
It would be harder to explain the Easter Bunny than to explain its fictitiousness. 


But actually, there's so many fantastic things to marvel at in reality that are as good as or better than made up stuff.  For a child to be able to differentiate the two - that's key. 
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“The Swamp is where Gators live.  We feel comfortable there, but we hope our opponents feel tentative. A swamp is hot and sticky and can be dangerous." - Steve Spurrier

CatsbyAZ

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #38 on: August 01, 2019, 01:18:03 AM »
Reading through the responses to the OP, 80% of the “advice” is well intended but clueless. Not necessarily bad advice, just clueless, which leads to my point that I think it’s perfectly OK for parents to not really know how to react to their children asking about death. Among the philosophical ironies of the human condition, one is how much more we strive to understand life’s impossible uncertainties than come to terms with the obvious certainties.

My first personal experience with death was as a five year old. An older relative who lived with us passed away from on going health complications. My mom very sweetly explained to my brothers and I about being better off in the afterlife while in the kitchen my Dad argued over the phone about the price of coffins. Then the next day social workers and police came by to confiscate a number of belongings, one of which had to be explained by my peers when a year later I mentioned at school what I heard the police talking about with my parents: cocaine. It was 1980s South Florida so what’d’you expect?
« Last Edit: August 01, 2019, 01:36:09 AM by CatsbyAZ »
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847badgerfan

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #39 on: August 01, 2019, 06:54:33 AM »
Quote from: CatsbyAZ on August 01, 2019, 01:18:03 AM
Reading through the responses to the OP, 80% of the “advice” is well intended but clueless. Not necessarily bad advice, just clueless
So, you don't mind hairy naked men in your house then?



There ya go, 'Fro. You got a place.
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FearlessF

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #40 on: August 01, 2019, 09:59:50 AM »
cocaine in a hospice situation can be easily explained

imo
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OrangeAfroMan

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Re: OT - Death of a Pet & How to Tell Young Kids?
« Reply #41 on: August 01, 2019, 11:24:04 AM »
Being honest isn't "clueless".  I know it seems like an unsympathetic, ruthless thing, but it's not at all.  You would caringly explain what's going on, tell them it's okay to be sad and encourage them to ask questions.  I have ~25 students each year, and they deal with pet deaths, family deaths, family incarcerations, family drug use, deadbeat parents, homelessness, etc. 



The truth + caring/listening/support = the best you can do.
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“The Swamp is where Gators live.  We feel comfortable there, but we hope our opponents feel tentative. A swamp is hot and sticky and can be dangerous." - Steve Spurrier
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